The biggest liar
There is someone I've come to know over the years. He is the biggest liar. He will try get you to believe anything, as long as it's a lie. Big, small you name it. His very good at it too. He has had centuries of practice.Most recent lie I had been sold:
"It's all great and well that you want to be a History maker and all. But you're not a student any more. It was much easier back then being consumed by Jesus because you didn't have to worry about real responsibilities like life insurance, death benefits and whether or not you can afford medical insurance for your wife."
So I began to nod along, agree and be consumed by fear. Not a paranoid or paralyzing fear, but a fear that the whole world is consumed by. I'm sorry but I do not wish to bow down to those idols.
Being a husband/protector/provider/cultivated/servant/leader is going to be about a whole lot more than material resources.
TRUTH be told... This is no different from being a student. Its just a different package and the world tells you its different.
As a single student I faithed for far more:
- That I would make it fed and clothed through the final year of my degree.
- That giving up dating wasn't a stupid idea when I became a Christian
- That my older brother would be reconciled to the family
- That my parents would become Christians.
- That after my degree God wanted me back in Grahamstown to disciple people even though my parents were against it and I had no job or source of income going back.
- That I had to sell up my business that had just started turning over a profit. It was raking in R4000 a month (about 300 pounds or 680 US$) before all my business and personal expenses... talk about living on the bread line. HAHA!
- That I then had to move up to Gauteng with:
a) No certainty of where to live (or money to pay a deposit for rent)
b) No job to go into
c) Only enough money for the petrol to get me to gauteng... afterwhich my car would be due for a service.
- That upon leaving Grahamstown God was somehow going to bring Katherine back not only into the same country as me, but the same area (even though I had had no contact with her for 2 years) and that she would be my wife.
- That I had to put down a deposit for a flat knowing that my income was too low to get approved.... the building of which is still not complete and now my income is enough.
At the end and beginning of the everyday its still the same question as it was back then... will I die and live for Christ today. Will I seek first the Kingdom?
Back in Grahamstown it was not worrying about next weeks meals that got me fed. I didn't think about it. I didn't worry about it. I was consumed by some simple things:
- whose life can I change.
- how much money can I give away to people who need food tomorrow because I'm still good for another 5 days.
- how can I love Jesus more.
- What is the Kingdom of God.
God promises us that when we seek his Kingdom first he adds everything else we need into our lives. And guess what... he delivers.
Being used by God is the most rewarding thing.
So I'll end off with the words of Job.. Though God slay me, I will praise him. (or something like that)
http://meetmyjesus.blogspot.com/2006/10/deux-ans-demain.html
Check out that link.... It's by one of Katherine's friends (who will be one of the bridesmaids). Amber is to Katherine who John Walters is to me. A spiritual son/daughter that brings us much joy... even though we did such simple little things in their lives. They will always hold us in such high esteem and respect. All because of Christ in us... our hope of glory.
Time to lay it down
Gareth
posted by Gareth @ 11:10 am
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